and this was my favorite product:

“I could also use a recording of Tibetan monks chanting “Don’t eat in the living room” and “Take your hands off your brother,” because my voice seems to be just out of my children’s hearing range and can only be heard by the dog.”

You should round up some monks and do the recording- I bet it would sell like hotcakes. And I know some Buddhist monks with a good sense of humor… Maybe we all could get a JV thing going.